Blink - did I just lose 3 weeks of my life?

Holy crap.  Where does the time go?  I haven't made a post in 3 weeks and there is so much that has happened.  I probably won't begin to talk about everything that I would like to.

Big Sam

Three weeks ago John had the week off work to help me out with all 3 kids at home.  It went fairly well other than the constant crying (the babies and myself).  Then John went back to work and my mother arrived for a week's worth of help.  I think she thought I was being a little overly dramatic when she would call and I'd tell her that I was just crying or had recently thrown a large object across the house.  Then after two days here, in the midst of a witching hour feeding that always goes awry when trying to latch two screaming babies at the same time, she also started crying and said to me "I don't know how you are doing this."  Ultimately I would say that has to be our motto right now.  How exactly are we doing this?  Day by day, I guess.  Today, hour by hour.  Everyday is different, some good, some super good, and some just plain rotten.

Sweet Will

The twins are 2 months old today.  They are two days shy of 9 weeks and coming out of the colicky stage.  Things are getting a little bit better, but still very rough and moment to moment.  Lillian is still a great big sister, but she's gotten used to the babies being here.   And I think she is used to seeing how her mom handles them.  She is starting to get a little too rambunctious, getting in their faces and putting toys and food on them.  We have to keep a constant eye out, which is virtually impossible if you, god forbid, have to ever use the toilet and don't want to take a kid with your for once (nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing, is sacred anymore in this house).

And speaking of bathroom, a couple days before my mom left last Monday, we started to realize a slow down in Will's bowels.  Both boys had been going several times a day, which is what I am used to with breastfed babies.  We started supplementing their 4:00 bottle with formula about a week and a half ago because 4:00 is hard around here.  The babies struggle latching at the same time and staying on long enough for a full feeding.  Lilli is reaching the afternoon crazies, and I am supposed to be trying to cook dinner.  So it's much easier to just drop a feeding and start formula one bottle a day.  Well, I think the finicky kid is protesting.  He hasn't pooped in a week.  My neighbor is a PA and she gave me a natural remedy of a 50/50  molasses/milk enema which I attempted to perform this morning.  No poop yet.  I have a feeling that I didn't use enough and what I did use ended up coming back out on the paper towel under Will's butt.  But the kid was screaming, his brother screaming in the crib across the room, and big sister was flipping Cheerios all over the nasty shag rug in the nursery that sheds everywhere (Now she is going to need an enema from eating too much carpet fuzz), so I just decided to give up, try again later.

Right now I am able to write this post because for once, all 3 kids are sleeping at the same time.  I am trying to get the boys on a nap schedule.  I know I'm crazy because they are very young, but it can't hurt to get them used to the house being quiet between 1 and 3.  The only issue is I have to put them each in a vibrating chair to get them to sleep at this time of day.  This may bite me in the ass in about 4 weeks when I try to train them to their cribs.  Thankfully they are tired and drifted off quite easily after a morning of screaming.

Cute cousins.  Lilli did everything in her power to keep up.

I thought maybe today would be a good day because I made the mistake of assuming everyone would be fatigued after a long weekend in Grand Island, Nebraska for John's brother's wedding reception.  You would think after having one kid that I would know that kids, at least our kids, don't slow down when they are tired.  They gear up and they run twice as fast.  Which is pretty much how our entire weekend was.  The 4 1/2 hour drive up took us 7 hours.  We stopped at a McDonald's in Seneca, KS for lunch, and I tandem fed the twins in the back of the van in the midst of 113 degree heat.  What else do you do when you have a hungry toddler, hungry babies, and your only food option in 30 miles is a McDonald's attached to a gas station that even if they did have a changing table, I wouldn't want to use it?  You nurse, diaper, and shove down french fries in a parking lot for all to see.  Thank God our windows are tinted and I'm so used to sweating 24 hours a day that the heat doesn't even phase me.

One hot little girl and her sweet daddy.

The babies and Lilli really did quite well during this long drive.  And most of the weekend was good as far as the behavior of all the kiddos goes, so we had that going for us.  But unfortunately, this is a terribly difficult situation.  A toddler and 8 week old babies on a road trip for a wedding reception?  What are we thinking?  Its family and we didn't want to miss it, but I didn't even get to speak to the bride and groom other than an exhausted "Hello" on my way to the bathroom to diaper a baby in a chair and relieve myself with him in my arms, and a sweaty goodbye hug three hours later.  Lillian spent a good hour running up and down the courtyard outside with her cousin Connor, scaring me to death by the color of her skin and the sweat pouring off her forehead.  She'd had some M&M's from the candy bar earlier in the night and it was like she was on crack, you could not contain her.  The only time she sat still for 3 hours was about 20 minutes on her grandpa's lap so John and I could eat a meal (while holding babies of course).  I'm tired again just writing about it...

I try not to be a martyr with this situation we have because we realize how very lucky we are.  But we've realized a lot of late that people forget very easily how hard newborns are.  Shoot, we had forgotten.  And to have two of them at the same time?  Well, there are only a select few people out there that can understand this.  A good childhood friend of mine who knows dropped by with lunch last week (Thanks Karen!) and I told her that I have so much respect now for parents of multiples.  Its not something I thought much of before having them myself, but it takes a certain kind of person, it really does, and we were chosen for this.  It is an entirely different world than only having one baby.  Very soon it will get much easier, I remember just loving the 3-6 month stage with Lilli.  In fact, both boys gave me real big gummy grins last night after our 6 1/2 hour drive home, and I started crying.  There is gratification at some point, we just have to wait for it.  And remember that even when the babies are screaming their heads off during lunchtime and I can't leave Lilli alone to eat, that she will say or do something funny later in the day that will totally make me forget my stress 3 hours prior.

Well, just as I finish this up, Sam (also known by his daddy as "Tons of Fun" - he's a big boy!) is waking up from his very long 20 minute nap and his shrieks just woke up Lilli.  Hopefully I'll get another 20 minutes in the next 2 months to post another update!!

**Update to this post  - the 2nd molasses and milk enema worked like a charm.  The boy pooped within minutes.  I had to be more forceful to get it up there and keep it up there.  Sorry for the detail, but maybe this will help someone someday.

4th of July

She is just precious of late.  I adore her.

Obviously we are a very busy family right now, and I am finding difficulty showering, much less writing blog posts.  Things are a bit more difficult these days than they were 3 weeks ago.  The boys cry a lot.  And when I say a lot, I mean pretty much anytime they are not sleeping or eating, they are crying.  It makes for some very stressful days, evenings, and just within the last 24 hours, nights.  God help us if they start crying every night, sleep is my only salvation at this point, and I'm not getting much of it.  Our only saving grace is that our 2 year old has actually been quite lovely lately. The twins were six weeks this Wednesday, so everyone says we should be coming out of the woods, the light at the end of the tunnel is visible.  We pray to God that is the case, or you might be seeing us on the news.  My sister-in-law may have said it best when she called to see how I was doing, only to hear all 3 kids crying in the background, "Well, you haven't been arrested yet, that's a good thing."  This is coming from a woman who's done this before, so she knows.

Lilli's face shows the heat

Basically we noticed a distinct shift in crying towards the end of last week, the babies were just over five weeks.  We started the weekend off with a bang, no pun intended.  Our neighborhood had an annual bike parade and BBQ on Friday night for the 4th of July.  We try to do these things for our sake and for Lilli's, its good to get out of the house even to just go 4 houses up the street.  Problem was, it was about 165 heat index that night, and we didn't even consider how hard that might be for Sam and Will.  Well, crying ensued on our walk home and continued for almost 2 hours straight.  They were fed, changed, burped, etc.  They just screamed.  Endlessly.  We think now due to heat and stimulation.  Thankfully Lilli was so tired that she slept through all of it.

The only birthday present John received.  A small poop from Sam.

Since that night we've had good days and bad.  I think Monday the 4th was a good day, but honestly I can't remember all the details.  The amount of interrupted sleep we get is enough to let us function, but not enough to accommodate a full service memory.  I did happen to remember though that Monday is also John's birthday.  Not that it really mattered that I remembered though because he still didn't get any gifts, just like Father's Day.  Usually all he wants is to celebrate the 4th like he did when he was a kid.  At breakfast he said, "30 years ago, we'd all go to my uncle's house, or they'd come to ours, and then I'd just blow shit up.  All. Day. Long."  Then he added, "I can't believe I can say 'thirty years ago' and actually have a vivid memory of it."  Yes, we are on the back side of our thirties, and this twin infancy thing is making us older by the minute.

Adorable 4th of July feet.

We spent most of the 4th at home.  Lillian got to play in her new purple elephant pool, a birthday gift from her aunt and uncle.  She loves it.  I spent most of the day inside with the twins trying to keep them pacified.  Then Lilli and I took a girls' trip at snack time to Starbucks for chocolate milk and Chai tea.  Around dinner time we decided last minute to pack everyone up and head to John's co-worker's little party over by Lee Park where they were to shoot fireworks off at dark.  After dinner at the party, we decided fireworks were out of the question for us for the second year in a row (Actually last year we didn't have a choice.  We were in Vail, just John and I, and it rained heavy on the 4th.).  Lilli was bouncing off the walls around 8:00, which in our world means she's super, super tired.  So we did the right thing and headed back home, no sense in repeating Friday night's nightmare.

Lilli having the best time with Dad in her pool.

John and I decided lately that we are just a little bit crazy.  Not only do we decide to pack up our small children and go to parties, but we've also of late taken the whole family places like Home Depot because we've decided we have nothing better to do but paint and redo our bedroom.  When telling my mother about this latest endeavor and our lack of sleep, her words were "Well, I can't really feel sorry for you then."  Obviously, she's right.  We might be certifiable.